Thursday, February 18, 2010

Exposure: I'd much rather be waiting and watching in the shadows.

I already feel a bit exposed by this daily discipline. This already feels like I have walked into a place with no shade, where the sun beats down on the ground with unrelenting intensity. I should perhaps explain, since I don't have that many readers of this blog, to whom am I exposed, my wife asked? Though it is more the choosing to be out in the open. I have approached this blog much like I approach spending a night at a goth club. At a goth club if you arrive early say 11 pm you will find maybe one or two people on the dance floor most wandering and lurking at the edges of the dance floor, in the darkness away from the various lights of the dance floor. you'll greet anyone you know but you'll stand or sit on the edge, waiting, watching. The ideal goth club is one that has either a slight labyrinthine character whith seating away from the dance floor or plenty of seating near and around the dance floor but still in the shadows of the club, places where one can simply wait and watch. I am often among the few who will venture out on the dance floor, but only if I love to dance to this song, but then when the song is done, I'll go back to the edge of the dance floor and wait. Eventually on a good night soon the club will fill, and then suddenly it seems all these lurking Goths are on the dance floor together all having discovered that they just have to dance to this song if the DJ is good there will be several songs in a row that one dances to before returning to the edges to watch and wait in the shadows of the club.

This is something like how I have approached this blog (and I suppose my approach to the various social media of the interwebs as well): I may post something if some thought of event simply has captured my attention and wont let me go. But then It will be several days or even weeks before there is something else I must write about. But then there are periods where I will write a couple to several posts to this blog in a row, before going back into the shadows and wait and watch.

Perhaps now it is clear why this posting daily feels a bit like finding oneself in the desert sun exposed squinting wondering why I chose to leave the shelter of the dark and overgrown forest.